Where's Johnny Jet? Getting Spa Treatments in Malaysia

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Like most people, I can't believe 2006 has already come and gone -- did it fly by or what? In terms of traveling, it was a banner year for me. My goal was to visit 10 new countries -- and I'm elated to report I visited 11 new ones. I have a year in review video at the bottom of this page, along with a video of this week's destination. It takes us to a place so plush Luciano Pavarotti said, "I almost cried to see how beautiful God had made this paradise." If you want to check in to an over-water bungalow above the Straits of Malacca, hop aboard. We're getting on a 60-foot yacht to a private island, heading into 2007 in style.

Kuala Terengganu to Kuala Lumpur

Last week we left off at the beautiful Tanjong Jara Resort in northeast Malaysia (here's a link to the archives). From there we hopped on a 35-minute Malaysia Airlines flight to Kuala Lumpur (KL). You have to love the KL airport, because it's so efficient. I wish U.S. airports would learn some of their simple tricks to make our traveling lives so much better. For example, each baggage claim has a monitor with the exact time counting down to when the first bags will appear. It took less than 10 minutes -- and the airport is huge.

Kuala Lumpur to Pangkor Laut

We headed to Pangkor Laut Island. It has won all kinds of awards, including accolades from Condé Nast Traveller UK's Top 100 list and Top 10 Most Luxurious Spas (Tatler U.K.) Getting there is difficult, unless you have deep, deep pockets and hire a helicopter ($5,000 -- one way). Most guests drive three hours from Kuala Lumpur, then take a 30-minute boat ride. We hired a van and driver through the resort, for RM850 (US$240). To pass time my friends and I played perverted car games, and stopped along the way to raid a gas station convenience store. We bought almost every different type of unusual potato chip flavor we could find (each bag cost only 45 cents). Surprisingly, they all were tasty. When we arrived at the Marina in Lumut, the island's 60-foot private yacht was waiting for us. Each way costs $200. Another option, a public ferry, costs RM 50.00 ($14) each way for adults, RM 25.00 ($7) for children 2 to 12 years old.

Pangkor Laut Resort

It was raining, so the boat ride was not as pleasant as I imagine it normally is. But it was still special, and pulling up to the island -- seeing all the bungalows sitting patiently above the glistening water -- was memorable. Pangkor Laut is a 300-acre, privately owned island in the Straits of Malacca three miles off the west coast of Malaysia. The resort has developed only a fraction of the unspoiled two million-year-old rainforest, where some trees reach 150 feet high. This island is both lush and exotic. When we stepped off the boat an army of porters grabbed our bags, and a greeter walked us to the lobby. Along the way our mouths dropped open in amazement. From that short walk alone we could tell this place would be like Fantasy Island -- and the three nights we had there would be far too short.

Rooms

We were served a non-alcoholic fruit drink made of roselle (it has a cooling effect like lemonade), and given cold towels and the usual paper work as we watched peacocks roam the lobby. We were quickly briefed on Pangkor Laut's 148 Malaysian-luxury-style villas. Later we saw a couple of the eight estates in a nearby secluded cove. They belong in Robin Leach's homes of the rich and famous. In fact, many celebrities have stayed there, including Pavarotti and Joan Collins. However, I was staying (and couldn't have been happier) in one of the 22 over-water bungalows standing elegantly on stilts over the sea in the new Spa Village section of the resort (they are known simply as the Spa Villas). Twenty-one other villas -- basically the same but a few years older and a bit cheaper in price -- are called Sea Villas. If you're worried about being over the water, that's okay; there are also 105 Beach, Hill and Garden Villas.

Getting Around

Getting to the Spa Villas from the lobby is kind of a hike: either 10 minutes along the wooden walkways of the Sea Villas and through a couple of restaurants, or an 8-minute hilly shuttle ride which travels back and forth every 15 minutes. I prefer the walk, which I did often to use the free wireless high-speed internet signal in the lobby (there are also three free computers in the library). Walking at dusk was even more magical, because the fruit bats came out then. Watching them fly between palm trees, with the sea and its reflecting lights as a backdrop, was unforgettable. Speaking of unforgettable: Walking through the Spa Village for the first time, I stumbled upon four monkeys (yes, monkeys.). They were sitting on a wall along the path three feet away, staring at me. The bellman told me if I ignored them, they won't bother me. He also warned me not to feed them. It was like being told not to pet a dog when you're a kid -- they're so cute, you want to reach out and grab them. But I'm smarter than that (I think).

Overwater Bungalow

This was my first time staying in an over-water bungalow since the island of Taha'a in French Polynesia (near Tahiti) a few years back. My room at Pangkor Laut was similar: spacious with high ceilings, dark wood floors, a large balcony with deck chairs, a bathroom with an oversized tub, and windows that open onto the sea. The shower head too was oversized, though neatly hidden in the ceiling, and provided excellent water pressure. All the rooms have air-conditioning, a comfortable king bed, a desk, telephone, large toiletries, hairdryer, mini-bar, coffee/tea machine, a CD player, and an electronic safe.

Unexpected Guests

The resort is so beautiful that I filled up an entire 1 GB SD card in the first couple of hours. As I sat on my bed downloading the pictures and videos to my computer, I heard a noise outside. I got up to see what all the ruckus was about. Guess who was on my doorstep? The monkeys. They were cruising along my balcony — I couldn't believe it. I thought one of my colleagues had put fruit on my doorstep as a joke, but no one did. The monkeys were just checking out their neighbors.

Dining at Pangkor Laut

There are nine different places to dine at the resort. At the Samudra, guests get authentic Malay and traditional Chinese cuisine at a restaurant built on stilts over the sea near the lobby. The Palm Grove Café, also near the lobby, is where the extensive buffet breakfast is served with tropical fruit drinks (these guys make the best and most unusual banana pancakes). Oasis Bar, next door, has drinks and snacks. Uncle Lim's Chinese restaurant was my favorite -- not only for the open-air design, with dark wood and colorful red lanterns throughout the interior, all atop a rocky outcrop overlooking the sea -- but because Chef Uncle Lim made the best honey crispy chicken I ever had. Below Uncle Lim's is the Sri Lagenda Lounge, where many people meet for pre- or post-dinner drinks. Sri Lagenda Lounge and Fisherman's Cove are the restaurants folks must walk through to get to Spa Village. Fisherman's Cove serves fine (and the most expensive) dishes, including fresh seafood, steaks (the beef is from Australia), and Chinese and Italian cuisine (this is the only restaurant with a dress code, which means no shorts or flip-flops). The Royal Bay Beach Club is located next to the lap pool in the Spa Village, and offers light breakfast, lunch and snacks throughout the day. Then there's Chapman's Bar. Located on the other side of the island at Emerald Bay, it serves sandwiches, salads, local dishes and traditional satay. It's the perfect place to go to after the jungle trek (more on that in a minute).

Sunset Cruise

Guests can also arrange for a quiet, romantic four-course sunset dinner at sea aboard the resort's teak wood boat (called a tongkang). Another great way to spend the evening and meet other visitors: Every Thursday the resort takes out its other boat. Honeymoon couples and returning guests can travel around the island to watch the sun set.

Activities at Pangkor Laut

Most people who come to Pangkor Laut want to relax. But there plenty of activities to keep guests busy: tennis and squash courts, two swimming pools, a workout room, a TV room (there are no television sets in rooms), yoga and tai chi quan (scroll down for more on this), and a popular daily jungle trek. Don't let that term scare you -- it sounds a lot more strenuous and adventurous than it really is. Yip Yoon Wah (people call him Uncle Yip), the resident naturalist, is retired and loves to talk. The 2-kilometer path he uses takes his group 2 ½ hours to complete, though it could actually be done in 15 minutes (there is also a much longer trail). But if you go through the rainforest on your own you will miss Uncle Yip's informative talk. He explains everything -- and I mean everything -- pointing out interesting wildlife like the macaque monkeys (I saw 20 at one time), a wagless pit viper (see the video below), and a tropical monitor lizard the size of me. I actually thought it was a Komodo dragon, but Uncle Yip set me straight. There is no charge for the walk.

Emerald Bay

Once through the jungle you arrive on the other side in beautiful Emerald Bay (there is a free shuttle back). Emerald Bay was chosen of the Top Ten Beaches in the World by the London Daily Telegraph in 2003. I might have agreed, except it had recently rained, and the 80-degree water was littered with plastic bags. The resort has a special sifter boat to pick up the bags, but unfortunately it's not enough. Villagers just throw their garbage and plastic bags in rivers, and after a storm the plastic bags make their way out to the island. I think the government could rectify this problem by putting nets at the mouths of the rivers, and of course educating the villagers about the importance of not littering.

Spa Village

Staying in the Spa Village is a treat. Not only do you walk through their peaceful gardens every day, and swim in their private lappool, but the spa itself is just a short distance away. If you stay at Pangkor Laut Resort, it would be almost a sin not to get a treatment. This is by far the nicest spa I have been to in my life. Spread over four acres between the sea and the rainforest, it comprises a collection of low-slung buildings that are mostly open-air. Everything here is designed to soothe and refresh the senses, including the herb garden and reflexology path. I wanted to sample everything. I couldn't, because of time and money -- but I spend two afternoons indulging.

Bath House

Spa Village treatments all begin with the unique bath house ritual. This 50-minute treatment RM250 ($70) includes bathing traditions from across Asia. I was greeted by a soft- spoken Balinese therapist, who was the sweetest thing ever. Everything she said was preceded by the quiet words "Mr. John." After handing me a welcome cold towel, ice water and a refreshing lemongrass drink, she began soaking my size 13 feet. In her soft voice she said, "Mr. John is the water too hot?" As I tried to figure out how to propose marriage to her, she gave me an invigorating Chinese foot pounding (in feudal Chinese times this was enjoyed only by concubines). She then escorted me to the male bath house, where I put my clothes in a locker and donned on a colorful sarong and was led to the traditional Malay "circulating" bath (based on villagers' custom of bathing in streams or rivers). After I threw a coin in the wishing well, she instructed me to awaken the senses by breathing deeply in four different sweet-smelling steamers. Next it was time for a Japanese-style bath, where I could wash myself with a "goshi-goshi" cloth on a small stool (just like my trip to Kinosaki, Japan last year). I then took a dip in the heated Rotenburu pool and was served green tea. The grand finale was a Shanghai scrub. She gently exfoliated and washed my body in a private scrub house. In Shanghai this is traditionally offered only to males, but at the Spa Village both men and women get it done.

Chinese Herbal Hut

Next on my spa list was an appointment with a Chinese doctor, at the Chinese Hut. I was curious to learn more about traditional Chinese healing, which sees the body as a "harmonious whole." Some of Pangkor Laut's traditional Chinese healing sessions are rarely practiced anymore. I learned this in my meeting with Dr. Jok-Keng Lee, a 43-year-old doctor who has been practicing medicine since he was 12 (.), and holds a master of arts in Eastern philosophy) from the University of Iowa. Speaking perfect English, he began by asking me questions like how I was sleeping, and did I have pain anywhere? He then took my wrist, and used three fingers to take my pulse. It got eerily quite for about a minute (it felt like 20). With those three fingers on my pulse, he was checking my liver, kidneys, heart and lungs. He said everything was strong, but my lungs were cold. "Cold?" I wondered. He asked me if I use my asthma inhaler a lot. I nodded yes (I use it up to seven times a day). He told me I need to get off it -- cold air is not good for my lungs. He said I should cover up whenever I'm in the cold (including exposure to air conditioning). He recommended I use natural remedies to in place of my inhaler. He suggested that whenever I have the urge to hit my inhaler, I should drink ginseng tea or strong coffee, or eat chocolate. I thought he was crazy, but I liked his alternatives and kept an open mind. Before I left, he recommended I arrange for a Tuina-Anmo massage, and moxabustion. I had no idea what they were, but I took his advice.

Tuina-Anmo Massage

It turns out Dr. Jok-Keng Lee is not the resident Chinese doctor -- he is the hotel's consultant, who flies in once a month. The everyday Chinese Doc gave me the Tuina-Anmo Massage (50 minutes, RM 250 [$70]) and moxabustion (50 minutes same price as the Tui Na... whatever). Dr. Li spoke very little English, and my Chinese is nonexistent. He normally uses an interpreter, but did not with me. That made things interesting (lots of hand signals). Dr. Li had unusually strong hands, and his fantastic massage focused on the acu-points of my body to restore the joints. Speaking of joints -- next came the Moxabustion. The doctor used an herbal stick the size of a Cheech and Chong fatty, burning mugwort close (I'm talking VERY close) to specific acupuncture points. At times I said, "Damn, doc, you just burned my ass" (fortunately he had no idea what I was saying). I allowed this moderate torture because it's supposed to be highly effective for stimulating the immune system. He also used a cupping technique, in which cups remove heat and wind in the body. I know you're thinking "whatever" and "this stuff doesn't really work."

Tai Chi Quan Classes

That was not my only encounter with Dr. Li -- he was also my Tai Chi Quan instructor. I did not realize how short, compact and fit the man was until I signed up for his class RM50 ($14). No one else showed up, so it was like having my own private class without having to pay the RM 250 ($70). Tai Chi Quan is supposed to develop inner stamina, and circulate energy. It also makes Westerners look like dopes. With a boom box in hand and Tai Chi music ready to roll, Dr. Li found a grassy area smack in the middle of the spa grounds so everyone could see how foolish I looked. Of course the doc was graceful, moving like a swan. I was the complete opposite. At times I felt like he was making me pretend I was the Karate Kid, as he showed short, swift moves that had me blocking and throwing punches into the wind. I tried to stay focused, but I couldn't. I realized Tai Chi Quan is a lot harder than it looks, and I pick up things slower than I thought. The best part came 20 minutes into the lesson, when he asked if I wanted to take a break for tea. I wanted to break for my bungalow.

Ayurvedic Hut

The next day I met with an Indian doctor for a consultation at the Ayurvedic Hut. Ayurveda is an ancient Indian healing tradition, meaning "science of life." I did not hit it off too well with this doctor, but I did sign up for a 50-minute Abhyanga massage (cost 250RM = $70 ) as he recommended. I had no idea what an Abhyanga massage was, nor did I have any idea what I was in for. All I know is that I went into a poorly lit room in a hut in one of the tree villas. I was greeted by a friendly young Indian man. Behind him was a wooden table a few inches thick, with a lip around the edges so nothing would drip off. It looked like a place where people are embalmed. I did not have a good feeling about this at all. To top it off he made me strip down naked, and put on a homemade Tarzan-like covering -- I'm talking skimpy. At that point I yearned for the paper underwear the KL Ritz provided.

Abhyanga Massage

I sat on the cold wood table, and noticed a pot of hot oil on the stove. I learned it was Ayurvedic herbal oil which supposedly strengthens the internal organs, nervous system, muscles and bones, and regulates the digestive system. It also supposed to delay the aging process. Well, I think I aged a few years in half an hour. The masseuse began by applying another special oil on my head, and giving me a really enjoyable scalp massage. Then the pot came off the hot stove, and was brought bedside. He dipped his paws in, and put handfuls of warm oil on me beginning with my arms. All I heard was Indian music in the back room, and his long, rapid strokes. After 10 minutes he lay me down on the hard table, and put more oil on almost every nook and cranny of my body. Warm oil feels good, and I started to relax. After what seemed like an eternity, it was time to flip over to have my back done. The next scene would be a perfect clip for America's (or Malaysia's) Funniest Videos. I was so excited to turn over on my stomach that I moved waaaay too fast. I flew off the slippery table like a fish from a fisherman's hands. It hurt like you wouldn't believe. I got up with my Tarzan covering halfway up my waist, and said I'd had enough. But of course I was not done. You can't walk around the tropics covered in oil. By the time I reached my room I would have been covered with mosquitoes. To get the oil off, of he rubbed some cold greenish gob stuff that smelled and looked like crushed peas all over my body. At last, I took a shower.

Overall Experience

What can I say about Pangkor Laut Resort besides that I will never get an Abhyanga massage from a man again? Seriously, this place is amazing -- but there's room for improvement. If the government can clean up the plastic bags, stop Indonesia from burning its land and bring back clean air, it could probably be one of the best places on earth. The rooms and water are not as unbelievable as the over-water bungalows in French Polynesia but when you factor in the price (rates begin at $275 USD, a quarter of Tahiti's), then throw in the incredible food, service and friendliness of the staff, this place blows most others away. To top it off, I have been home over a month, and guess how many times I've used my inhaler? Maybe four. I went to my asthma doctor just to make sure my lungs were clear and the first thing he asked was, "Have you been working out?" I said, "No, I just went to Malaysia." He told me my lungs sound better then ever. Can you believe it?. Dr. Jok-Keng Lee and Pangkor Laut have seriously changed my life. They could change yours too. Pangkor Laut Resort & Spa Village, c/o Lumut Post Office, 32200 Lumut, Perak, Malaysia; tel. 011-605-699-1100.

John E. DiScala (aka Johnny Jet), is the founder of www.johnnyjet.com, the ultimate travel website and weekly newsletter. He logs over 150,000 miles a year, has been featured in over 850 articles (including Frommers.com, USA Today, Time, Fortune, the New York Times, CNBC and MSNBC), and has published the book, You Are Here Traveling With JohnnyJet.com.

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